They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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