haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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