woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
