I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
