I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
How many fucks given?
0.12846
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
