I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
I currently don't understand fingers.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
