True but thats because hes a fetus.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
