i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Randomize
