My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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