Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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