Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
