i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Randomize
