i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Randomize
