Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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