I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
