you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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