I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
