True but thats because hes a fetus.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
