she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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