If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
