Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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