so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
either way he was missing a nipple.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
