By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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