At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
