i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
