If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
In other news, I just burned my penis
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
