Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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