he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
it was like his penis was on wheels.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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