i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
