i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
