my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
