it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
