Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
