This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
everyone is single if you try hard enough
He passed out mid-signature
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
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