I must be too annoying 4 u.
Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Randomize
