She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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