but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
