I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I just gargled with NyQuil
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
