This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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