When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
