I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
They have beer where we have blood.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize