Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
He shit in the fireplace
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize