she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Randomize
