A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
