Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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