They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
