He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Randomize
