She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
