wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Randomize