I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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