"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
