I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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